Least Favorite Band – The Black Eyed Peas

Black Eyed PeasIt’s no secret who my least favorite band is. Ever since the Black Eyed Peas unleashed “My Humps” upon the world, I felt compelled to battle all that was wrong with today’s pop music – inane lyrics, tuneless melodies and rapping, and an emphasis of style over substance.

The Black Eyed Peas encompass all of the above. They are a boil on the buttocks of music, somehow having convinced the music-buying public – either through some means of sorcery or a pact with Satan – that they are relevant and hip. Hell, Fergie even peed in her pants during a concert once, but the Pea juggernaut (pun not intended) continued.

Seriously, anything goes for them. They can say the dumbest things in a song, and hardly anyone calls them on it. FunnyCrave ranted about the most retarded Black Eyed Peas lyrics, and some actually tried to defend the lyric “Let me f— up your ear till my sperm is up in your brain.”  Other BEP winners include:

  • “We gonna break it on down / Rub it on your belly like a ultrasound”
  • “Can you feel it in your body-ah (can you feel it) / Coz I can feel it in my body-ah (I can feel it) /It feels good to my body-ah”
  • “Bebot bebot Be bebot bebot Be bebot bebot be”

I did not search long for these lyrics; in fact, they were chosen randomly from a list of Black Eyed Peas songs. It’s like shooting fish in a barrel.

Even on those rare occasions when they happen to get a catchy hook – I must admit to humming “I Gotta Feeling” on occasion and then slapping myself silly – the lyrics prevent you from actually singing it in public for fear of someone mistaking you for a mental patient: “Let’s do it, let’s do it, Let’s do it, Let’s do it, and do it, and do it…”

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  1. Gogmagog

    Isn’t it harsh to refer to the lyrics as “retarded?” Especially when the band did their damnedest to make the mentally disabled feel invited to party with the their 2003 song. That is, until said retarded felt so offended they demanded the title be changed.

    In defense of the band, I like that song where they offer up a kooky hook and Fergie sings “no no no no.”

    And the other one where they do that, too.

    And I like every video where Fergie looks as little like a catfish as possible.

    And I think it’s nice that they let those other two dudes, the skinny one and the one who isn’t will.i.am, feel like they’re part of the group. That’s inclusive, too.

  2. AMD

    “They are a boil on the buttocks of music,” Or indeed, on the hmphs of music.

  3. judith

    People actually listen to this stuff? Is this what you found where the buffalo roam?

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